Dave Barry, who married a soccer writer, offers up some classic “it’s funny because it’s true” answers on soccer parenting:
Q. What is my job, as a parent, during a soccer game?
A. Your job is to yell instructions to your child and the other children on your child’s team.
Q. Should I make an effort to educate myself about the rules and tactics of soccer before I start yelling instructions?
A. There is no need for that. As a parent, you have a natural intuitive understanding of the game, which you should share with the entire world by constant yelling.
Too true, too true.